The Land of Opportunity

Wow this chica has been busy. As it stands, I'm going to be making enough $$ in June to never have to work a "job" again !!!

Yeah I know. It's huge. I'm building an empire. She's taking OVAH!!!

Today is my birfday. (& the start of my two week holiday) I'm off to Winnipeg with Jordy tomorrow night (*shudder* ick the night bus we leave at 10pm arrive at 9:30am)i don't care I'm just pumped to spend some time with my man. We're there for a week then I'm off to G'bourg til March 7. The movie that was shot there & that also has all my fam in it as extras, is being premiered. How exciting! It's the story of TOmmy Douglas. I'll let ya'll know when it airs on CBC. Pretty nutz.

Well I'm off...

...to the gym....

It's wierd how life hits rock bottom & then flies all the way to the top once you decide to make a change to grow.

I LOVE MITTEN!!!

Raise your hand if you miss the Pumpkins

I bought a tribute cd to the best alt. band ever called "The Killer in You" today. It has the likes of Eighteen Visions, Static Lullaby, Armour for Sleep & MURDER BY DEATH (yay) doing some kool renditions of ol Smashing Pumpkins classics.

Although no-one can sing it like Corgan....

"close your eyes & sleep don't wait up for me"

check it out anyhow...it spawned me to re-visit all my SP albums, even got a lil misty eyed at parts.

Yuck

I got food poisoning yesterday while at the region meeting/
Then I had to get on a delayed Air Canada flight that was the SMALLEST plane ever that almost didn't even land in S'toon cuz of the weather.

Sick stomach + scary turbulence = Natty puking in S'toon Airport washrooms

I'm home sick today...what a whirlwind this past 24 hrs. I've gotten a promotion at HMV, my home based business is taking off SO fast, & Vancouver is coming up quicker than I'd like.

I must lie down now...I'm a dehydrated husk! :(

PS Boo-urns to the Delta Bow Valley in Calgary for having shitty non-veg friendly food. I had to opt for egg salad which obviously was sitting out for awhile. *shudder* At least the "expelling" process is over....ew/ sorry about that!

Change is GOOD!

So hey everyone! Sorry for falling off the radar like that, I guess sometimes you need a bit of time to disappear & get back into your "zone". ANyways here's the skinny; (I unfortunately have no time to write in detail)

Jordy & I are getting some counselling & we're ok. Thanks to everyone for the support & good juju ( I sure could feel ya!!) Bottom line,we're committed & love each other so yeah...we'll make it no matter what.

Also I've started up my own business! I'm SO excited at the opportunity this is going to give me to acquire the cash to move to Vancouver and go to school. AH!! I still can't believe it!! Anyways more on that coming soon...

I plan to get in touch with ya'll soon to have a lil more one on one...I still plan to work on getting myself more ... in tune I guess? But yes...I love you all!

So I must go pack. I have a region meeting in Calgary tomorrow for HMV (yes my first one!! I'm freaked!! Try not to think of the flying part hmmm?) I'll be back Wed. evening however. Then I work on developing my business...then off to Lydia's. BIG couple days. But ah I have to depart...

Clarity

It's hard when you have to admit that you're not ok, & probably haven't been for so long. There's so much ugliness rooted in my past that is hindering me from being who I really am, or even knowing who I am. The last 3 days have been the most difficult I have ever experienced...more so than when Craig shot himself. Jordy has been staying elsewhere...I guess you can call it a break, it's scaring the shit out of me. But I know we'll be ok. He's the thing that is suppose to remain constant in my life.

I'm realizing things that are not my fault, they are my childhood. I need to move on, I need to start living. I need to stop HIDING. It's time I bring people back into my life & stop being so superficial. I guess this post is the first step (as most of you are probably like "Holy F***" right now) You all are here for me...I don't know why I've never allowed any of you in. (well I do know...but I have to stop feeling like you're going to leave me or die)

.......

So clarity...yeah it hit me like a ton of bricks while out with Rob last night. This will probably be the most hardest road I'll be undertaking in my life but I need to. Jordy & I need to stop living in a "sick" relationship. I thank all of you for being in my life...my clarity is realizing I've never been alone, I chose to be that way.